rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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