Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I just want nice things and good sex
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
My vagina is officially offended.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
