Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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