I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize
