I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
That accounts for only three of the penises
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
