the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize