Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
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I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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