I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
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