If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize