Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.