I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
should my penis look like a turkey
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
