if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
