i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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