Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
