I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
