I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize