I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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