Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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