I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
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Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
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After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
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