i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.