Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
