do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
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