let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize