"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
