Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Randomize
