I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize
