How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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