Rock
Scissors
Fuck
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
