i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
