What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize
