Are we in a gay sports bar?
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize
