I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My liver just had a heart attack.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
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