dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
