it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Randomize
