doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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