It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
