hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
