He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Randomize
