Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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