but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize