8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
