So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Randomize
