I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Randomize
