Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
