yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
I just found puke in my bra..
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Randomize
