I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
you never un-have a 4some
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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