she was so not down for the gang bang
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
