paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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