so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Randomize
