She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
Randomize
