I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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